A Simple Wish
by Tex110
Summary: A solitary wish granted, that's all Edmund wants.


Author's Note: Thanks a million to Silverwhitepoison for beta-ing the first draft of this story. And another huge thank you to all those who reviewed my other stories!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

**A Simple Wish**

Edmund stood outside the main hall leaning against the wide railing on one of the many balconies in Cair Paravel. Inside were many whirling colors and lively music. Several fauns were playing on their flutes while the guests (Edmund guessed there must have been all of Narnia inside) danced energetically in celebration. Edmund observed it all with a rather detached happiness. He was glad the Narnians had their freedom, perhaps even ecstatic. But what about his freedom? He could never rid himself of the shame and cowardice he'd bestowed upon himself. Much less the burden of his betrayal.

Edmund sighed and ran a hand through his hair distractedly. He used to think it was Peter's fault; he had blamed everything on his older brother. But no more. It was his fault alone, and no one else's. If he couldn't forgive himself, how could the Narnians? How could his _siblings_? Even Aslan himself seemed to have completely forgotten about it. But not Edmund.

He wished the party would end soon so he could think alone. He could barely hear his own thoughts amidst the chatter and music. Ironically, he had withdrawn himself to far into his mind that he didn't even hear the light footsteps that approached him.

"Edmund?" the voice of his littlest sister broke through the haze of his discomfort. "Oh, Edmund, why are you over here? Come and dance, the music is just lovely!"

Lucy looked everything a queen should be. She had a richly embroidered red cloak on and a blue silken dress on beneath it. However, she had the impish smile of an eight-year-old, and she was absently scratching her wrist where the light fabric bounced against it and tickled her.

Edmund smiled down at her. "I don't know how to dance, Lu."

"Oh, but Edmund, I don't either," Lucy replied, looking hopeful. "And I've already danced with the fox, a lion, and a centaur. And I've danced twice with Mr. Tumnus and twice with Peter. I think I'm starting to learn it just a little." She looked up at him entreatingly, eyes large. "Dance with me? Please, Edmund, please?"

He opened his mouth to say something, but she poked out her lip a little.

"Pretty please?"

Edmund grinned in spite of himself, remembering that a similar plea had lead his beloved sibling to Narnia in the first place.

"I'd do it if I were you, Ed." Peter passed by carrying a goblet, one of his brilliant smiles splitting his face. "She's already succeeded in dragging me through two dances. She's a persuasive little queen. No matter the argument, you'll end up dancing with her."

Peter gave Edmund a roguish wink and walked on. It took Edmund a single glance Lucy's face, alight with a mischievous grin, to concur wholeheartedly with Peter's analysis.

"How about it?" She asked innocently.

"Alright, Lu." Edmund sighed, giving her an affectionate tap on the nose. "But promise me you won't make me do two."

Lucy smiled, if possible, even more widely and took his hand, pulling him into the warmer hall and onto the marble floor. She really had gotten the gist of the dance and led him through it quite well. Edmund thought he faked his way through it alright, even if he did tangle himself up several times.

Ever true to her character Lucy succeeded in leading him through more than just one dance. Three songs later she finally let him retreat to the wall with a musical laugh. Edmund smiled slightly as he watched her skip neatly over to Mr. Tumnus. He had no doubt that she would pull the poor faun through many more dances before the night was over. His eyes traveled over the blur of colors to spot Peter dancing with Susan. Or trying to. His (according to him) angelic brother was laughing and watching his feet. As he'd suspected, Susan had already picked up the dance and was moving through it with her characteristic fluid grace, effortlessly moving and adapting with Peter's untrained attempts. He could see her lips moving as she patiently coached him through it.

Edmund's smile faded. He didn't deserve such wonderful siblings. By the Lion, he didn't deserve any of this. With a sigh Edmund wished he would stop feeling sorry for himself and enjoy the party. But the feelings wouldn't leave him alone. More and more he waited for it to end, hoping it would be sooner than later.

But it wasn't to be. When Edmund slowly made his way to his room it was well past three in the morning. His brother and sisters had bid him goodnight with cheery faces and words. However, Edmund could tell Peter wouldn't be going to bed anytime soon. The taller boy knew something was bothering his brother, and he wouldn't sleep until it was worked out. Consequently, Edmund couldn't help but expect a visit from him.

For a moment, Edmund considered confiding in his older brother. After all, Peter had a way with him that nobody else could hope to imitate. Not even his parents. Edmund shrugged it all off. Peter had enough to deal with at the moment, and he wasn't about to add to it with his own, in his mind, pathetic concerns. He closed his room door behind him with a thud and glared unseeingly at his reflection in the mirror hanging opposite him. Why did Peter have to be so protective and caring, almost to the point of idiocy? Edmund knew that, if faced with the situation, Peter would take a death blow for him without a thought. He would do the same, of course, for Peter or Susan or Lucy, but he wished they wouldn't have the same mentality.

He clenched the heavy fabric of the cloak he wore irritably. Why couldn't it have been himself who was responsible for the hard things? Instead, he had to constantly monitor what he showed and complained about so that Peter didn't worry about him as much. So much for that. Peter worried more about him than both Susan and Lucy put together. Edmund was glad he'd come to his senses about his siblings sooner than not. Had he, Edmund, remained calloused, Peter would probably be dead because of him.

Annoyed almost to the point of tears, Edmund stalked out onto his rooms personal balcony. The warm sea breeze ruffled his hair as he stood there for a moment.

A thought came to him, born of frustration and desperation. If he could have a single wish granted, just one, he would wish for forgiveness. He already knew that Aslan had forgiven him. The majestic lion had told him so with firm clarity when he'd been rescued.

However, Edmund refused to believe that his siblings had forgiven him until they voiced it. But as he thought about it, Susan and Lucy had basically already done this. Susan had with her gentle words and kindly actions. Lucy had done so by her cheerful demeanor. She had also told him on multiple occasions that she trusted him. He didn't know where Lucy got it from, but she had the uncanny ability to make you feel loved and wanted whenever the hem of her dress or the tip of her shoe was in sight.

Any of Edmund's other thoughts halted abruptly as his older brother's face flashed into his mind. He realized it was Peter he wasn't quite sure of. Peter had always been rather reserved about himself, having been appointed as protector and guardian of his family. He wouldn't allow his own thoughts to surface, much less voice them. Edmund could read his emotions but not his mind. If it were one thing Edmund could have he'd wish for Peter's forgiveness.

He walked down the steps and headed for the beach, though he didn't register his movements until the sharp edge of a broken shell penetrated the sole of his foot. Edmund blinked in mild surprise and stooped to pluck the shell out of his foot. He straightened, shell shard still in his hand, and looked out over the calm ocean. The moonlight rippled over the surface in a silvery splash, and another breeze caused his cloak to flap heavily. His hand tightened on the shard of shell he continued to clutch and he moved a little further down the beach. He sat down and buried his bare feet in the just now cooling sand. Then he threw the shell with all his might into the gentle waves.

A steady beat of footsteps, muffled by the sand, announced the presence of another. Edmund had more or less expected this and did not have to turn to know that it was Peter.

"Hello," he said quietly.

"Nightmares?" asked Peter simply, referring to the horrible dreams Edmund had been victim to since his return from the White Witch's grasp.

Edmund shook his head and looked up at his brother. The golden crown had been removed and he was in his velvet pajamas, yet Edmund thought he looked more kingly than ever.

"Not really."

"Then what were you doing?"

Edmund shrugged and looked away, drawing a finger through the sand. "I wasn't really doing anything."

Peter dropped into the sand next to him with a gentle sigh. He picked up a handful of the fine sand and let it slide through his fingers. They sat in silence for a while, each secretly glad for the others' company. It slowly became an uncomfortable silence for Edmund, who knew he would have to reveal all to his brother in only a matter of time. He shifted his position and fidgeted with the cuff of his sleeve.

Peter regarded him knowingly and said, "What's wrong, Ed?"

Edmund glanced at him then stared hard at the sea and whispered, "Do you forgive me?"

Peter's carefully neutral expression melted to be replaced with loving comprehension.

"Oh Edmund, of course I do," he said, "I forgave you the moment I saw you return."

Edmund raised a dark brow and avoided eye contact, so Peter continued.

"It was my fault you ran off in the first place," Peter didn't pause to let the look of surprise fade off of Edmund's face. "I wasn't, and I haven't been, a very good brother for you. I can't blame you for searching for someone who would, perhaps, openly show their pride for you."

He reached up and gently ruffled Edmund's hair. "I won't deny the fact that I wish it had been someone other than the Witch you found. But I can tell you right now that I'm proud of you. And that I'm sorry."

Edmund shivered and pulled his legs into his chest, resting his chin on his knees as he hugged himself. He didn't want to look at Peter. He didn't want to see the loving forgiveness, so vastly undeserved, pulsing unrestrained from the warm blue eyes. But he didn't need to look Peter in the eye to see this, he could feel it as the older boy moved closer and wrapped an arm around him. It was enough. Peter was, at long last, providing the kind of comfort Edmund had needed for so long. Edmund, couldn't restrain the flood of emotions any longer. A tear fell onto Peter's hand. And then another. Before either of the boys knew it, the younger was crying in earnest trying desperately to remain silent as heavy sobs ripped through his body. He bowed his head and tentatively rested it against Peter's chest.

He needn't have worried. Peter hugged him closer and curled a protective hand around his brother's head. Edmund felt a warm weight as Peter gently rested his cheek on the top of his head. Peter used his free hand to rub Edmund's back the way their mother had done for them.

"I'm so proud of you," Peter murmured, not really relying on his words but his tone to soothe. "I'm sorry I've been a failure to you, but I promise to make it up."

Peter's gaze fell to the glassy ocean. "I'm so sorry," he repeated. "Mum would never have forgiven me for doing this to you."

As it were, Peter's voice alone could soothe Edmund at any given time. Needless to say that Edmund relaxed into his brother's loving arms. His hands, clenched tightly in Peter's tunic, loosened their grip fractionally yet his heavy tears did not slow.

"In some ways you were, and you are, so much older than me," Peter continued, shifting the angle of his head on Edmund's. "Perhaps that's why I was so blind to my actions towards you. Why I was so harsh. In other ways you were just a kid. My little brother instead of my second father. But I never saw that clearly."

Edmund tensed again as a thought struck him. "What of everyone else?"

Peter paused, lifting his head slightly so he could look down at the younger teen. Edmund began tracing the design on the edge of Peter's cloak with one hand while the other tightened convulsively into a fistful of his brother's shirt. "How can they possibly accept me as a king? I'm a traitor and a liar."

Peter absently resumed his stroking of Edmund's hair. "They are trusting creatures, Ed. They're more than willing to give you a second chance. And besides, you fought with us in the battle. You saved my life and you also destroyed the Witch's staff. That's more than enough to gain their trust."

"Back in England I wouldn't have gotten a second chance."

Peter shook his head. "That's because back there everybody is human. They don't trust nearly as easily. Don't forget that Narnians are not human. They are not suspicious like we tend to be. And they forgive you, Ed. They truly do."

Edmund sniffed and buried his face in Peter's chest, his whole body shuddering as he tried to hold back another violent wave of sobs.

"Shh," Peter murmured, "It's alright. Let it all out, Ed."

Edmund wrapped his arms fiercely around Peter's waist as he began to cry. Peter held him close.

"Everything will be alright," Peter assured him, beginning to rock his brother in a gentle swaying motion.

He watched brother's body shudder as he tried to breath normally through the irregular sobs. He felt his lips tug upward in a slight sad smile and he hugged the smaller boy closer.

"I love you, Ed," he murmured. "Try to sleep."

And softly, he began to hum a simple lullaby their mother used to sing for them.

Edmund closed his eyes and, for the first time since he could remember, allowed his tears to fall without restraint. The low and gentle thrum of Peter's voice relaxed him fully into the welcome embrace. As Edmund drifted into slumber, he recognized the answer to his desperate wish. His brother had forgiven him.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

**Note:**This is probably my last Edmund/Peter brother fic. However, I should have a Peter/Susan sibling fic up in a couple of days at the least so keep your eyes open!


End file.
